Category: Dysfunctional Families

Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family

Generalizations

Dysfunction defined:

Physical/emotional abuse

Chronic physical illness

Alcoholism/substance abuse

Sexual Abuse

Inconsistent and unpredictable parenting

Chronic marital conflict

Typical Dysfunctional Parenting:

Denial

Avoidance

Rationalization

Projection of blame

Over-Control

Negativity

Ridicule/shaming

Anger and hostility

Role reversals

Chronic crises/unpredictable

Lack of positive reinforcement

Conditionality/non-Empathic

Dysfunctional Rules:

Don’t talk

Don’t trust

Don’t feel

Results of Dysfunction:

Depression

Anxiety disorders

Low self-esteem

Substance abuse

Fears of rejection

Self-defeating patterns

Negative relationships

Self-critical

Controlling

Difficulties with intimacy

Affectively blunted

Over-responsible

Perfectionistic

“All or Nothing” thinking

Hypervigilant

Not “Good Enough” or unlovable

Difficulties with spontaneity or fun

Positive Traits:

Heightening Sensitivity

Empathic

Inner Strength

Problem Solvers

Take less for Granted

Commitment to having a healthy family with compassion and caring

Overcoming Dysfunction:

Awareness of dysfunction

Support from healthy people

Open mindedness to change

Increasing flexibility

Positive Self-Talk

Recognition of feelings

Communication of feelings

Recognition of needs

Delegate responsibilities

Creating safety

Finding mentors

Work in therapy

Self-Worth & Good Enough

Parenting oneself